Not sure why, but this guy is in my thoughts today..
I was 20, living in Clapham, working as a nurse, travelling on the Northern line tube into work sometimes very early, and often returning late at night. It was on this commute that I met him. I'm fairly sure his name was John. I knew him for the best part of five years, but you can know someone and not really have to use their name.
He'd always say hello and we'd talk, catching up on how life was treating us both. Over time we found out various parts of our history. He'd had a wealthy lifestyle somewhere in Ireland, but it had all gone wrong. He still had family over there, but wasn't in touch. He'd struggled with alcohol and drug addictions but was clear of them for most of the time I knew him. He sold the big issue and slept rough much of the time. He talked about his sadness, we shared lots. He was a friendly face, a warm heart. He was a point of safety too, looking out for me on the way home, especially at night. He was a friend.
When I met Rob, he became Rob's friend too. Rob would wait for me so he could walk me home after a late shift, and I'd find them chatting.
Then we moved up to Birmingham.
Now I haven't got a clue where he is or what he's doing. I think of him fairly often, and if we're in London and pass through Clapham Common tube I always look out, half expecting to see him.
He was important in my life then.
There's nothing pressing I want to say to him now, I just can't help thinking.
4 comments:
This brought back a rush of memories of friends that I have lost touch with over the years. You spend time with these folks, become ingrained into their daily lives and routines.... then time marches on and routines change. Somewhere in all that, keeping in touch becomes harder as you struggle to keep up with the daily "in your face" demands. All the while you promise yourself that you will make time to seek out these people.... as time slowly ticks along, and the promises remain undone.
Sometimes it's sad how we tiptoe through life to meet the most amazing people, only to know them for a short time.... but perhaps that's how it was meant to be in the big picture of things: people connecting with other people, to see us through a certain path in our life. Parting is such sweet sorrow... but the memories help us through to the next path we take. It's touching we can think back to how it made a difference in our lives.
I couldn't help but think of this writing I've read over and over through the years as I read your blog entry...
"Reason, Season, or Lifetime Friends"
When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.
They are there to meet a need. Then without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, they will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that the need has been met.
When a person comes into your life for a season, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons. Those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. You must accept the lesson, love the person/people anyway, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
Who knows what John's purpose was, but he fulfilled it in some way.
Blessings to you Katie... I am sure he will always remember you and your kindness, and you'll never really know how that relationship with you impacted his life.
Ellen, thank you, it is all too easy to lose touch, and life does move onwards - I suppose I just wonder how his life panned out.
Jayne, thank you too, I have read that before but haven't seen it for a while, blessings to you as well
Hi Katie.
It's interesting how a person can be an integral part of our routine during a slice of our lives and then vanish...........once our routines evolve and move on. Even though the connection was strong.
I believe it's more than chance when this happens....when the connection with someone is important.
My husband and I were talking about this last night. He was watching the news and there was a story on about a medical research project. The man they interviewed happened to be someone he went to high school with...... since we have moved away from our childhood home in Ontario, we havent stayed in touch with many people who were so important in our lives at that time which led us down the path of wondering where and how some of them are......
amazing really how many people we touch and touch us?
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